Tuesday, June 16, 2015

Father's Day Fitness for us Domesticated Dads!

Being a father now-a-days is more fulfilling and rewarding, yet busier than ever.  I am not trying to sound like a masculinist, but there is sort of a double standard set upon on us present-day fathers, not only by our nurturing wives and baby-Mommas, but by society in general.  At least here in San Diego’s progressive society.  Think about what is expected of you as a husband and father, and what is put on your plate daily.  Most of us are working full time, and the minute we clock out, we immediately are taking over duties as primary parent, if not volunteering at their schools, or assisting as coaches, helping with homework, not to mention grinding through at least half the load of household chores.  ‘Stay-at-home-Mom’ – what’s that?  Many of us have a (equally busy) wife who also works at least part time, just to be able to afford to live in beautiful San Diego and provide our families the lifestyle it offers.  What’s more, no San Diego mom I know of is willing to be content just tending to the home and kids.  Mothers these days have yoga classes, extensive social groups, hobbies, and a serious list of personal goals!  We Dads pick up the domestic slack by donning every hat in the household often with zero appreciation in return because it is what is expected of us.  It’s considered our duty and even a privilege.

     Don’t misunderstand me.  There are few things as rewarding in life as spending quality time with our children, and most of us desire to be more involved and hands-on, if given a choice.  But all this means time for Dad is pushed to the bottom of the honey-do list and is often considered low priority by spouses and bosses alike.  Just finding time to go for a run, or go to the gym can not only be near impossible, but can be wrongfully perceived as selfish, or putting ourselves before our family.  Any opportunity for continued personal growth and self-mastery? – Well sorry, but that is a luxury that we left behind the moment we had to put together the crib for baby #1.  Or so it might seem.
The truth is, while you might have to pause for a decade or so at becoming an expert at mastering you, nothing makes us grow and mature more than fatherhood.  Perhaps there is no greater opportunity to love another human being, more than fatherhood.  If you are blessed with children, know that the collective experience of raising a family leaves us wiser and more evolved during life’s journey.  Leading a family and household is as great a challenge as any corporate C.E.O. will face, and what used to be the sole home-making domain of the mother is now equally shared with us fathers.  Like it or not, we have become fully domesticated.  But back to finding time to still workout…
Max with daughters Bryce Ava and Summer, Honolua Bay, Maui, October 2013.